Language and Gender

Dominance Theory: In “mixed-sex conversations” men are much more likely to interrupt than women do. This is backed up by an old study consisting of a small sample of recordings by Zimmerman and West. They found that in 11 conversations between men and women, men interrupted significantly more than that of women. However, it is important to recognise that this was a rather small-scale study which may have been a product of its time (1975). It would not be safe to generalise the findings to other people. This could be supported by Geoffrey Beattie who found that, after recording conversations, men and women interrupt as much as each other (men 34.1, women 33.8)- the difference here being too slight to be notable. Zimmerman and west concluded that interruptions are a sign of dominance; they don’t want to listen any longer and have the ability to speak over someone, which lead Beattie to ask: "Why do interruptions necessarily reflect dominance? Can interruptions not arise from other sources? Do some interruptions not reflect interest and involvement?" 

Deborah Tannen and difference: Deborah Tannen explains men and women's language use as being extremely different. She pin-pointed 6 main areas: 

• Status vs. Support.
• Independence vs Intimacy.
• Advice vs Understanding.
• Information v. Feeling.
• Orders vs. Proposals.
• Conflict vs. Compromise.

Status vs support: Men live in a world whereby conversations are seen as ways of gaining authority/status. Meaning that throughout conversations they must not let others ‘dominate’them. Whereas women use conversations as support; ways to share ideas.

Advice vs understanding: Deborah Tannen explains the ways in which men and women react to complaints. Suggesting that men see it as an opportunity to ‘correct’ the situation, whereas woman are usually seeking an understanding- “When my mother tells my father she doesn't feel well, he invariably offers to take her to the doctor. Invariably, she is disappointed with his reaction. Like many men, he is focused on what he can do, whereas she wants sympathy.”

Orders v proposals: Woman are less likely to tell someone what to do (order) and instead hedge their point or use indirect ways to get what they want: “could we…” “should we…” etc. Men prefer to use imperatives for a direct approach. 

Robin Lakoff published many assumptions of women's language and how they use language. Among the list are many ways which seem to have a negative spin on the way in which women talk; a language which seems to create ‘timid’ people who perhaps are ‘unsure of themselves’. For example:

• Use indirect commands and requests: Like, “My, isn't it cold in here!” Which is actually a request for the closing of a window for example.
• That women do not have a sense of humour and do not understand jokes. Meaning they find it difficult to tell jokes correctly.
• Hedge more; “sort of”, “kind of” etc…
• Use question intonation in declarative statements: So when stating something, women raise the pitch of their voice at the end of the sentence suggesting that they are unsure of themselves.

http://www.universalteacher.org.uk/lang/gender.htm#tannen